- Why does the parasite have the hiccups?
- Why am I gaining so much weight? I try to eat super healthy and yet I am packing on the pounds, or as my doctor said “the holidays have been good to you”. I might as well shovel in some ice cream and twinkies if I am going to get fat.
- Why are my neighbors up and having conversations at 4 in the morning?
- Why do the fire alarms in this apartment always go off? I feel like I am back in college and living in a dorm.
- Why was it 28 degrees this morning in Florida?
- Why can’t I just lay an egg and put it in an incubator for 9 months?
- Why do people eat at chain restaurants? Am I the only person that dislikes them and the mediocre food they serve?
- Why do boys walk around in shorts and t-shirts during the winter and then complain they are cold?
- Who stole my Amazon package? I hope you enjoy your green yoga mat...douche weasel.
- Why does my stability ball keep deflating? Is it because I am/have a fat ass?
- Why do records cost more than CDs?
- Why would you make the doors on a bathroom go to the floor? How am I supposed to know if someone is in the stall?
- Why does my nephew keep making me sick? Does he hate me?
- Is it grey or gray?
Tuesday, February 2, 2010
Monday, January 18, 2010
Any email exchange between me and the husband on a Monday morning.
EL: OMG, 4 people are fighting over whether you can hydroplane on ice or if it is just sliding. They are yelling at each other and calling each other dumb ass. Very professional...
BL: I mostly hydroplane on the love I have for my coworkers, but once I hydroplaned on delusions of grandeur.
EL: I am going to hydroplane my fist into their faces.